Monday, August 27, 2012

Acceptance (Would You...)

The life I lead is bold ready to unfold...I wouldn't be truthful if I came from the exact same mold. The truth is I don't and what connects us is just b.l.o.o.d. You are just my little brother and I am just your big sister. Therefore I ask of you

"Would we be friends if I weren't your sister?"

I think not for we are totally different, but what binds us is the unconditional love and the fact that we have come from the same womb..such as our little sister. Our little sister, who's quite a gem with a very expressive heart to mend. She gonna be such a riot, not on a spunky little chocolate diet. She's my little chocolate and I will feed her chocolates; the one who always has my back and I don't even have to judge. When the people chat and their words do lack....sincerity..this little girl comes to me and let's me know they were talking about her big sister, and this little child isn't one for taking crap. She reminds me of me when I was her age, she is a knowing or should I say wise child. She came here in the midst of the crowd to join us; her big brothers and sisters. And now that I am on my own..I surely do miss her like I miss my brothers too. You guys are my half and half , and if we weren't connected by blood..I wonder...

"Would we be friends?" "Would you care or give a damn?" or "Would it be different because I am unlike the clan?"

But I am who I am! A woman not detered at first glance. A woman who is determined to conquer it all and make it through this weathered storm, because I love you all. Anything in life is feasible and that is why I  do what I do to become a budding example to you. Although I don't consider myself a superb example, I am human and we all make mistakes. What is not a mistake is that I will forever be the "PARIAH" of the family.

Just as I have been. Just I have been and you'll never be able to mend what I have seen or felt. The poignant part is that I can talk about this issue and progress into the woman that I was meant to be. But I'll tell you one thing is clear, my love and passion crescendo's through the love of that chocolate bubble bee named RVB.

She is my baby sister,
She is my heart
You are my brothers,
AP JR, and BP
You give me strength even when we don't communiate
I have learned to accept things as they are
I don't go back on my word
Because if I can't come through,
Why the hell am I even talking
Therefore as I walk this earth
I have you as inspiration
You are my brothers and
You are my sister,
Truth be told,
We've come from the same womb which 
Never speaks
Sometimes in this life
We have to let it be
If not today or tomorrow
Let's leave behind the sorrow
For if I'd not make a move,
Would you come through

You are my brothers and I love you, just as I love our sister. I love you all and accept honesty. Not any apologies for how you have felt or what was said. If you didn't mean it you would not say it. No bull shit intended with a life that's unraveling.

We will change, we will grow. I am here for you...I want you to know.....that nothing else matters in the mean time because you are my brothers. You are my sister.

You see folks as things have transpired within this life, I have took it for what it is worth. I lived, learned, loved, gave it up and yet another chapter will soon capture my soul. Who cares about the love lost or not gained. Through perserverance anything can be attained.

I have never asked for a pity-plea, but self respect of thine self is what keeps me going. I will always know what's good versus the evil because of my intuition. I choose not to let the opinions of others define, though at times I worry. It's not a negative that I worry about certain things or the folks that I love, because if I didn't care I wouldn't worry. This is how I see it. My life is a big picture unfolding and so is yours.

At times the thought is pondered whether they love me or not, though just a thought I believe I am hot to trot. I actually owned a shirt with that message. Then again that is totally out of the left field and I see this for what it is, basically if I weren't not their blood they probably wouldn't deal with me (family). The funny thing is I hardly dabble in that area, life is more simplistic this way so you'll be able to expect the unexpected because people are full of messes; blood or water. I am full of messes because I have flaws and so does the entire Universe. This is what makes us imperfect poignant souls. I choose to highlight the positive aspects rather than focus on the negative. This is all you can do in life--value your love, life and self-worth because no one isn't going to love you if you cannot love yourself.

May I make a point of saying that you don't need someone else to make you happy. Happiness is in the eye of the fucking beholder; you'll either get with it or get loss. It depends on your frame of mind. I say this because your thinking is the very process that leads you to the life you have and would like to have. Everything is a process and it is not easy. It will all get better in time just as if it were a Leona Lewis love song. But, it's not so deal with it!

Concluding this segment ask yourself; would they love me if I weren't their blood or water, would they? If not, you know what to do! As the Single Woman #SW (Miss Mandy Hale) said "life's too short to go where you are NOT celebrated."

Remember this when another soul tries to rain on your parade. Things do flow with the seasons. Stay strong and not worry about your brothers or sisters.

As I look at it...there's one chocolate bumble bee who gives me divine inspiration---my little RVB (sister) xoxo. She's not afraid to be who she is at 7 years of age and neither am I!


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